-Welcome to the Indiana
Fine Woodworking Awards, or, as I like to call it,
heaven. ♪♪♪♪ That's a nice chair. Corinthian leather,
solid mahogany frame, with I believe are hand-cut
mortise-and-tenon joints. Quarter sawn zebra wood,
joined by floating tenons to the black walnut
corner posts. This one is constructed
with American cherry wood. -Cherry, huh?
Now, I have just one question.
-No, the wood does not taste like cherry You cannot eat it.
-I — I was not going to eat it,
Carpenter Ron. I was going to lick it. Recently, I made a chair. When I was finished,
I thought it was a good chair. I submitted it to the Indian
Fine Woodworking Association who felt it merited
consideration for an award [chuckle]
It's been a real whirlwind -Do you exercise? -Yes.
Lovemaking and woodworking Come on, Brendanawicz, relax Let me make you a canoe. ♪♪♪♪ The Zorpies are ridiculous Also, their ceremonies require
the playing of flutes. I happen to make flutes
in my wood shop. Flutes are $80 apiece. And recorders are $150. Smart move, son. -Thanks, Ron. -Because you currently owe m $16,000, for the wood.
-What?! -Mary, Mother of God. [ Giggling delightedly ] That's Christian Becksvoort! He's the modern master
of the Shaker style. I never dreamed that I would
see him in the flesh. -Ah. -Balsa wood? You could at least use mahogany. -This is all you wrote?! Three lousy lines?! Why would anyone need more
than three lines? I'm describing a person, not something complicated, like a wooden sailing ship or proper dovetail technique I made my first chair
when I was five, but the quality of the wood
was wanting, so, when I turned nine,
I used my factory wages to purchase some
beautiful local walnut.
[ Thudding ]
-Ron! What was wrong with that one -It was too perfect. It looked machine made. I don't want 'em to be
the kind of people who never work, live off their trust funds who buy their wooden furniture When my company took on
the Morningstar development and I realized it meant
bulldozing Ann's old house I salvaged her front door. Then I stripped off all the
terrible paint and lacquer People really don't know how
to finish wood properly. -This tear, caused by the overwhelming
thoughtfulness of my friends will be my baby's first memory ♪♪♪♪ -Saltwater will warp the wood, so, keep your tears in you
eyes, where they belong.
-There's something
occluding your ear. -It's sawdust. Just blow.
-[Blows] -I have an idea. I will build a small wood mode of the Parks Department. -Wait. better idea. We make a gingerbread
version of the office. -Oh!
-Oh hoh hoh hoh hoh. That's so good! -Wood model's better. -And we can decorate our offices with candy canes and gumdrops. -Aw, that would be so adorable -Thanks, Ron!
-Excellent. -That's such a cute idea. -I have some great red birch with a nice spalting. I already have
some scale wainscoting..